getting back up

i think we have found our new ‘normal’ around here.

we have known our littlest for a month now and we are officially settled.

life with two kids plus a chronic illness is quite challenging some days.

there’s been a lot more of this…

but also a lot of this…

(*insert super cute photo of my Big holding my Little.  i mean, super cute*)

there’s also been school planning (starting in 3 weeks!)…

and lots and lots of time with friends who have been the hands and feet of Jesus by helping me so much!

there hasn’t been a whole bunch of house cleaning or special time with my husband.

and for that, i’m learning to have grace.

honestly, my energy is running out.  there hasn’t been much diversity in our days.

hopefully there will be a day soon when i will not have to make a choice.

the same choice i make each day when i come to the same crossroad.

i hope it comes naturally to me and i will not waiver.

do i slow down, sit down, quit?

or do i keep running?

do i keep washing the same (same!) 15 dishes everyday?

and the same clothes?  and diapers?

do i continue to work to connect with my 2 year old?

and discipline instead of fighting?

do i dig deeper in the Word even when i only have a few minutes?

and pray and cry out to Abba, my Father?

do i make an effort to play, talk, and sing with my kids?

planning activities, getting outside, looking them in the eye,

LOVING them.


yes yes

yes yes YES.

right now, that Yes isn’t natural.

it doesn’t come quickly.

and not at all some days.

my heart, initially, is No.

even after prayer and meditating on Scripture.

but the Lord is growing and changing me.

it sucks.

it hurts.

and when i quit

(because i have!)

the Holy Spirit is there telling me to

get back up.

Thank you, Lord, for your Helper.











thanksgiving: catching up

(all of these are genuine, but for the sake of time i’m just going to list them out)

day 11: nicole and joel!  they watched caleb while dane and i went on a date.  nothing went as planned, but it was still pretty fun.

day 12:  thought provoking conversations!  hosted some friends on saturday night and talked all night.

day 13: my niece. picked her up and she’s been staying with us this week

day 14: operation christmas child.  we are participating this year so i took the kiddos to target on monday.  what a great way to get the kids involved in giving.  this week is national drop off/pick up week so it’s not too late to fill a shoe box!

day 15: movies!!!  (see day 13. ha. these are great for my niece)

day 16: pets.  we put our precioius cleo down a year ago today.  i’m thankful that God made animals to be pets.  they are pretty special and we have some great memories of her.  we’re not ready for another one just yet, but we know whenever we are it will be a great addition to our family.

thanksgiving: day 10

today i am thankful for my friend, vivian.

it’s hard for me to pick out one person like that and dedicate an entire blog post to them, but she deserves it.

i see vivian almost every day.  we met at church and she practically took dane and me in when we first moved here.

but now she’s one of my best friends.

best mentor.

best accountability partner…as much as i don’t like it sometimes!

best encourager.

best running buddy.

best shopping buddy.

best girl talk buddy.

and just best everything.

if you have ever met her you will not be surprised when i describe her as ‘honest’ and ‘real’.

and i am thankful for that.


thanksgiving: day 8

i am thankful for technology.

phones, email, computers, facebook, skype, FaceTime.

it’s all pretty amazing if you think about it.

yes, it’s man-made, but ultimately was created by the Lord (because He created our minds!) and He chose MY time on earth for all of this to happen. incredible.

i wonder what He will reveal for Caleb during his life.

thankful: day 7

i am thankful for God’s creation.

today, Olivia Rae will be BORN!

and i went for a short run OUTSIDE!

and had to come back early because it was RAINING!

and had some yummy VEGGIES for lunch!

and plan to spend the entire day playing with my CHILD.

i am thankful God created all of these for me to enjoy today. 🙂

thankful: day 6

(this post was also supposed to publish this weekend!)

i am thankful for my church.

they have done some amazing things for us in the past two years.

they are the only family we have here.

through marriages, babies, sin, celebration, redemption…i have come to love them even more than i thought possible.

i am thankful that Jesus came to build His church and that we get to be a part of it.

thankful: day 5

(this post was supposed to publish on saturday…boo!)

i am thankful for marriage.

and that some people still find it sacred.

last night we celebrated the marriage/unity of a good friend of mine.

i was able to share some funny stories of my marriage as well as some sweet ones.

marriage is precious. and i am so thankful i have friends who think so, too.

thankful: day 4

i am thankful for this man.

my husband.

my everything.

just reading his thoughts over on his blog will make you fall in love with him, too. (get his side of fostering/fathering)

he’s one of a kind.

and i’m thankful God put us together.

thankful: day 3

today, i am thankful for Christmas music!

i don’t have a ‘rule’ for Christmas music.  some people wait until after thanksgiving or maybe after halloween.

it doesn’t matter to me. [Christ music…”Frosty” and “Sleigh Ride”, etc can wait until it’s actually cold :)]

kinda like cookies.  why just keep the goodness for one time of the year?

today, i purchased this album.

it has many classics.  and i’m a fan of zooey deschanel’s voice.  and it’s folksy.

it’s cold today and i’m looking around for Christmas gifts for my fambly.  perfect!

i’m thankful for Christ and i seek to celebrate Him each day.